The Glorious Interwebz

Long one here. Its chock full of truth, justice, heroic deeds, and all that other stuff. The average internet troller has roughly the intelligence level of a 5yr old, the imagination of a wooden stump, and the energy of 50 cans of Rockstar energy drink. [edit: For those who don't know, Omegle.com is a chat site that instantly makes you talk to a complete stranger from somewhere in the world. This can be a recipe for many different things for many different people, but for me it is just a way to help make the time go by faster at work] Enjoy:



Omegle.com
2890 users online
Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!

Stranger: PHUCK!
Stranger: How are you?
Stranger: proof your real
Stranger: say I heart penis

You: You are full of energy

Stranger: lmfao

You: and you spelled 'prove' wrong

Stranger: so!
Stranger: DONT JUDGE ME!

You: you are right, I shouldn't cast stones

Stranger: True.
Stranger: Cause I cast mofo bolders!

You: lol

Stranger: haha
Stranger: you touched my talala!
Stranger: MY DINGDINGDON!
Stranger: dong*

You: 92% of conversations on here start with people saying 'cock'

Stranger: I rather say
Stranger: panis =
Stranger: =]
Stranger: HAHA
Stranger: cause panis is like soo much FUNNIER!

You: The interwebz iz a strnage place

Stranger: lmfao
Stranger: thats ok
Stranger: I have my boxers pulled up so high they go over my man boobs!
Stranger: W00T!

You: lol

Stranger: I totaly got a banana hamic going on here!

You: That is fantastic!

Stranger: I KNOW RIGHT?!?!
Stranger: its soo comfy!

You: I find them restrictive

Stranger: ahh
Stranger: well I have a tiny penis you see.

You: ah, room for improvement

Stranger: yup
Stranger: Its ok

You: strnage

Stranger: FUCK!
Stranger: MY PHONE IS FUCKING UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Stranger: shit >>

You: I wouldn't know

Stranger: your right!
Stranger: lol
Stranger: I just restarted it =]
Stranger: cause im a mofo beast!

You: Let me guess, sprint?

Stranger: fuck no!
Stranger: AT&T

You: iphone?

Stranger: naw
Stranger: the new samsung 'The Jack'

You: mmmmm pepperjack

Stranger: yup
Stranger: its smexy as hell!

You: when its working

Stranger: true.
Stranger: Wow, haven my boxes pulled this high is really letting em air out, and im getting a bad whiff of NUTZ!

You: I just ice blocked straight through that comment

Stranger: lmfao
Stranger: well
Stranger: I'm just letting you know!
Stranger: gawshhh
Stranger: YAY!
Stranger: phone works nowwwwwwwww
Stranger: beast!
Stranger: SUPA FREAK!
Stranger: SUPA FREAKY!

You: spell reflect, double NUTZ for ya face

Stranger: Yeah
Stranger: um?
Stranger: totaly?
Stranger: WTF?!?!

You: Thats what I've been thinking this whole time too

Stranger: really now
Stranger: You have no life!
Stranger: haha!

You: that would be impossible for you to know

Stranger: no it wouldnt
Stranger: Due to the fac that I am you!
Stranger: fact*
Stranger: fuck
Stranger: you fail a lot!

You: very interesting
You: I see the truth of it

Stranger: Yes, very.
Stranger: very intriguing.

You: These internets are very powerful indeed
You: you just peered into my soul

Stranger: yes.
Stranger: I know.
Stranger: Deep stuff huh?

You: Are you a prophet?

Stranger: No
Stranger: Prophets are me.

You: Your clairvoyance is astounding

Stranger: Thank you.

You: you are welcome

Stranger: They don't call me chuck norris for nothing!

You: They call me Bill Brasky
You: I wear live rattlesnakes for condoms

Stranger: Ahh
Stranger: wow
Stranger: what a G!
Stranger: I'm so bad, fuck!
Stranger: I forgot the rest...
Stranger: thats how bad I am!

You: Michael Jackson even wrote a song about uit
You: *it

Stranger: I know this.
Stranger: I know all.
Stranger: All I know.

You: profound

Stranger: very.

You: The universe is your acorn

Stranger: no
Stranger: its my rosemarry.

You: Rosemary's Baby directed by Robert Evans?

Stranger: close.
Stranger: very close.
Stranger: more along the lines of RUSH.

You: Ah, now I understand

Stranger: very good mortal.

You: You are in the Limelight

Stranger: not at the moment.
Stranger: I'm in the crosshairs.

You: of the Germans?

Stranger: no
Stranger: I am German.
Stranger: I am asian
Stranger: I am Irish
Stranger: I am Indian
Stranger: I am all.
Stranger: no fuckin nigger though

You: In the crosshairs...of the media megaconglomerates?

Stranger: no
Stranger: In the crosshairs of socialism
Stranger: the fall of man kind as we know it.
Stranger: The one you call Obama
Stranger: Is the second comming of the AntiChrist.

You: Truth is stranger than fiction

Stranger: Truth is harder to Believe then fiction.
Stranger: Let your mind free.
Stranger: Lucid shall you become.
Stranger: Do not give Into the powers of the antichrist.

You: So, Obama is going to lead us in a worldwide genocide?

Stranger: YoYYou have been warned.

You: hmmm, I don't feel very murderous though. In fact, my 401k has almost doubled in the last four months.

Stranger: just wait...
Stranger: when time feels almost as bliss
Stranger: is when the true bein shall arise.

You: ...The calm before the storm...

Stranger: AH HELL NAW!
Stranger: the calm befor the nigger lover!
Stranger: FUCK! im bored!

You: it would appear we both are in the same predicament

Stranger: yes.
Stranger: Lol
Stranger: you seem to have a pretty vast vocabulary.
Stranger: Why on earth are you on here?
Stranger: seem intelegent enoguh lol
Stranger: enough*

You: amusement

Stranger: Ahh
Stranger: fair enough.
Stranger: Same.
Stranger: I just like fucking with people.
Stranger: HAHA
Stranger: Add them on myspace/facebook
Stranger: then delete them and call em ugly as fuck!
Stranger: and shit =]

You: So far I have gathered that you are smelling your own balls, and you think you are a god of some sort. Its all pretty fascinating

Stranger: lmfao
Stranger: great observation!
Stranger: but flawed logic my good sir.
Stranger: FUCK!
Stranger: I needa learn how to spell
Stranger: haha

You: bah

Stranger: its bad when your a sphmore in college and cant spell for shit!

You: yes

Stranger: sophmore*
Stranger: lmfao
Stranger: fuck
Stranger: thank for for spell check on my microsoft office!

You: it has saved many college lives

Stranger: yup.
Stranger: I would be doomed!
Stranger: plus my dragon naturally speaking 10.0
Stranger: lmfao
Stranger: I should pop that bitch in
Stranger: haha

You: you speak dragon?

Stranger: yes.

You: 10.0

Stranger: yup
Stranger: who doesnt?

You: I only speak dragon v7.2.4

Stranger: lmfao foreal?
Stranger: fag!
Stranger: upgrade dat shit
Stranger: nigga

You: Guess I am getting old

Stranger: very!
Stranger: v10.0
Stranger: has soo many neat features!

You: flame breaths?

Stranger: its more userfriendly
Stranger: yup
Stranger: and total dommination
Stranger: thats always a plus!

You: shit, I need to get some of that total domination upgrade

Stranger: fuck yeah you do!
Stranger: ITS THE SHIT!
Stranger: no lie!
Stranger: lfmao
Stranger: welp fuckin cunt nugget.
Stranger: I have class here in an hour.

You: I'll just walk around like fucking Trogdor

Stranger: So i needa get ready.
Stranger: wtf!
Stranger: you play runescape too?!?!

You: no, its from homestarrunner.com

Stranger: ohh
Stranger: fuck that shit!
Stranger: peace nigga!
Stranger: have fun trolling!
Stranger: I KNOW I DO!
Stranger: AND ITS LATER BITCH!
Stranger: hahah!
Stranger: FUCKIN GOT ONE ON YOUR ASS!
Stranger: FINALY!

You: OUT MOTHERBITCHCOCKFUCK

Stranger: yay!
Stranger: CUNT NUGGET!